Worst places you’ve ever taken a dump.

[Jay Bilzerian]

The original Watering Hole bathrooms are pretty high on my list

 

[BIGSTICK67]

I remember those days. It was normal to be pissing right next to a guy taking a dump.

How about the original Sidetracks in Lincoln? Dudes constantly pooping on the open (non-enclosed) toilet.

 

[That SOB Van Owen]

Good the see the off-season is in full swing

 

[22*43*51]

Was out on a walk through Volcanoes National Park on the Big Island when my bowels flipped.

If you haven’t been, it’s like the surface of the moon. Black lava flows, narry a bush in sight.

I told the rest of the group to go on ahead, don’t look back and I’d catch up.

Sacrificed some pride that day, as well as my left sock.

 

[Cash68847]

Was out on a walk through Volcanoes National Park on the Big Island when my bowels flipped.

If you haven’t been, it’s like the surface of the moon. Black lava flows, narry a bush in sight.

I told the rest of the group to go on ahead, don’t look back and I’d catch up.

Sacrificed a some pride that day, as well as my my left sock.

You sacrificed your pride long before that by being an Cockeye fan.

 

[Eaton Beaver]

Was at a funeral this morning. Poop cramps hit hard. Got through funeral. Leave and find a small grocery store. Waddle-sprint inside. No bathrooms. Waddle-sprint back outside. There is a McDonald’s 3 doors down. Make it inside—stall taken and the guy in there was showing no signs of leaving his post. Contemplate women’s room—obviously women in there as I can hear them through the door. Go back to men’s room—still no movement.

Decide to go to women’s. Erupt. Then women start piling in and I had to listen to another woman absolutely blow up a stall—sounded like a trucker. Then quickly left to walk past 3 women waiting in the hallway.

Ended up doing it again plus vomiting in a small truck stop south of Columbus on the way home.

Was a harrowing morning.

Love that trucker stop!

 

[LoudHogRider]

 

[HuskerPAC]

Love that trucker stop!

Was very pleasantly surprised! From the outside I was skeptical but it was that or shitting my pants in the car with an hour left of driving. I’ve driven past it a million times, will stop again.

 

[Eaton Beaver]

Was very pleasantly surprised! From the outside I was skeptical but it was that or shitting my pants in the car with an hour left of driving. I’ve driven past it a million times, will stop again.

When I go to a game I usually stop there and shit! Then grab a egg sandwich and tell them probably see you when game is over for beer!

 

[Mavsker]

Oh gawsh. This is my thread to shine as a several year IBS sufferer. Fml. Let me pull up a story to make y'all cringe.

 

[NEHusker54]

Havelock park on the playground.

Did you just confess to a felony?

 

[Cookiemonster]

Pro tip. Sapp bros bathrooms are elite for road trips and emergency shits.

 

[Boondock_St_Sker]

First I’ve I had an emergency shit I was 8…walking home from school in a field, pretty much by myself but out in the open. No one saw, that I know of, but the thought at 8 of some one busting me shitting outside was super scary. Also left my underwear at the same spot.

 

[Interloper]

Outside the speedway before the Indy 500, had to use a porta-shitter that was already stacked up to the lid when I closed the door...taught me that there are consequences for resuming drinking from the night before at 3am.

 

[Mavsker]

Opening morning of deer rifle season in the 308, 2019. Sitting in my tree stand about 30 minutes in and something ain't right. I'm hunting with my brother and I knew he'd be pissed if I had to bail out before first shot, so I kept my damn mouth shut. Bad idea.

I waited about an hour and let him know I'm gonna climb down and take a shit in the dry creek bed a quarter mile downwind. Even though I said I'd bury it he said no way because the deer would smell it. I told him in that case I'm gonna need to take the truck because I'm not going to be able to hold this in much longer.

He again was having none of it but after 30 minutes of increasingly desperate back and forth he finally caved. I walked the half mile to the truck in pure agony and despair of clenching. Cold beads of sweat dripped down my forehead as I climbed into the passenger seat.

20 minute drive home. I tried to put on my seatbelt but the added pressure had me in knots. Ten minutes in I told him I was going to poop my pants. But since I was in the passenger seat of his brand new truck I used all my willpower to hold it in.

Got to the house and I waddled towards the basement bathroom still in most of my hunting gear. I hadn't thought this through. I slipped off my coveralls and fumble down my thermal jeans just in time for that sweet sweet relief.

Had to flush halfway through the purge because it was piling up so high. I nearly filled the bowl.

(Bathroom was in immaculate condition, before I went in)

 

[turek420845]

Did you just confess to a felony?

Statue of limitations.

 

[Interloper]

Opening morning of deer rifle season in the 308, 2019. Sitting in my tree stand about 30 minutes in and something ain't right. I'm hunting with my brother and I knew he'd be pissed if I had to bail out before first shot, so I kept my damn mouth shut. Bad idea.

I waited about an hour and let him know I'm gonna climb down and take a shit in the dry creek bed a quarter mile downwind. Even though I said I'd bury it he said no way because the deer would smell it. I told him in that case I'm gonna need to take the truck because I'm not going to be able to hold this in much longer.

He again was having none of it but after 30 minutes of increasingly desperate back and forth he finally caved. I walked the half mile to the truck in pure agony and despair of clenching. Cold beads of sweat dripped down my forehead as I climbed into the passenger seat.

20 minute drive home. I tried to put on my seatbelt but the added pressure had me in knots. Ten minutes in I told him I was going to poop my pants. But since I was in the passenger seat of his brand new truck I used all my willpower to hold it in.

Got to the house and I waddled towards the basement bathroom still in most of my hunting gear. I hadn't thought this through. I slipped off my coveralls and fumble down my thermal jeans just in time for that sweet sweet relief.

Had to flush halfway through the purge because it was piling up so high. I nearly filled the bowl.

(Bathroom was in immaculate condition, before I went in)

Thanks Mav, this highly descriptive literary masterpiece has subliminally called me to the can.

 

[HuskerPAC]

I also shat in someone’s yard in Wayne, NE circa 2011. Coming home from the bars and my buddy pushed a dumpster over for some reason and it made a huge noise. So we take off running through backyards to get home. Well, one house had a sunken backyard driveway and my buddy didn’t see it. His 6’5” ass disappeared off a 5 foot retaining wall into this driveway and he lets out a hilarious groaning, “ahhhhhh.”

I already had to shit and start laughing so hard I knew I’d shit myself before getting home so I just dropped shorts and shit in the yard. Pulled pants up assuming when I got home I’d have to throw away my underwear and shorts and take a shower. It was one of those miracle no wipers—I was clean as a whistle.

I still wonder what the homeowner thought the next time he mowed and saw that dump. Hope he didn’t run it over with the mower tire.

 

[BluesBucksNHuskers]

Easy, in the middle of Devils Lake in January.

Shitting in an 8” hole in the ice in -20* with 20mph winds going is not something I’d recommend.

 

[Lionsfan93]

This thread is making me realize that we are a much more obese board than I realized....