MLPFC Shit Posting

[HuskerGarrett]

just seeing that bald vegan again gave me PTSD

HIP HIP!!!

 

[HuskerGarrett]

married 4 times

poor guy

 

[slattimer]

Ebronies, need some advice...Making a driving choice for the vacation...not flying...

Option A, Stay on the I70 to St. Louis, drop down to Memphis area, is a little faster, but 75 miles longer.

Option B, Take a straight shot to Memphis area, cut through the boonies of Methzou and the Land of inbred cousinfuckers.

Sidenote, will have Tits and the 4 kids, 4 under 7 strapped in the burban. I'm leaning towards option A because I hate slow stupid drivers and I'd imagine traveling through bumblescum I'll encounter many of them.

 

[lee_carvallo_12]

My Swedish Farmer Grandparents from Gothenburg = No Cards or dice in the house. (cuz Romans cast lots for Jesus clothes) No drinking, ever. No smoking, ever. No dancing. No swearing, unless working cows. @Woodrow F Call @scotchfrost9697

My German Cowboy Grandparents from Valentine = Have a pack of cards and a pack of smokes on you 24/7 to be polite. No beers in Church until after the sermon. Never trust a man without a vice or one that doesn't swear.

Both my mom and dad's sides are both German farmers from Bayard. Pretty much spot on. My grandpa on dad's side started smoking at 12. He and my dad farmed together until I was about 5 and they sold everything. in the winter time after they fed cows, they'd spend the rest of the day smoking, drinking coffee and playing pitch. grandpa would usually trade the coffee for booze in the afternoon. Grandma and mom loved that.

 

[lee_carvallo_12]

I grew up playing 5 point pitch. Started around age 8 and got to play at the adults table by age 10. I am such an azzhole snob when it comes to 5 point.

All other types of pitch games are not my cup of tea. (Exception is 4 pt which is the exact same as 5 pt. but w/o the joker)

We’ve been in Austin since last Wednesday and have played every night with my daughter/SIL. Good times and very competitive.

Unlike yore bride, Mrs. Bomber has upped her game over the years and can hold her own with any of the other couples we play with. And 4 of our 5 kids have played for years too.

.

Respectfully, I hate 10 pt. No real “strategy” involved, imo, as the only cards that matter are whatever suit trump is. Just not our game.

.

pitch snob here, too. i don't even like playing when the family plays 10pt. no strategy at all, the cards just play themselves most hands.

now, 4pt where you have to grab low (doesn't save itself).... now we're talking.

 

[BBTown Bomber]

pitch snob here, too. i don't even like playing when the family plays 10pt. no strategy at all, the cards just play themselves most hands.

now, 4pt where you have to grab low (doesn't save itself).... now we're talking.

As mentioned, we use the joker as the 5th point but that doesn’t change the game as far as play/ strategy. And we don’t play that you can lose low. Know some that do. Either way, the best pitch game there is, imo.

The only reason to play 10 pt is that it’s a much simpler game to play for inexperienced folks. Otherwise, it’s a waste of time.

.

 

[LoudHogRider]

Ebronies, need some advice...Making a driving choice for the vacation...not flying...

Option A, Stay on the I70 to St. Louis, drop down to Memphis area, is a little faster, but 75 miles longer.

Option B, Take a straight shot to Memphis area, cut through the boonies of Methzou and the Land of inbred cousinfuckers.

Sidenote, will have Tits and the 4 kids, 4 under 7 strapped in the burban. I'm leaning towards option A because I hate slow stupid drivers and I'd imagine traveling through bumblescum I'll encounter many of them.

If that southern route takes you down near Springfield, then across ... I did that route when our kids were younger and also in a Suburban. We were working our way back from visiting friends in Atlanta, and did a day at the Space Center in Huntsville, AL and had to visit Graceland whilst in Memphis. I remember thinking I was going to have plenty of opportunities to buy gas for the guzzler on that stretch of twisting, diving, turning road ... nope. Favorite memory of that drive was failing to brake hard enough in advance of a turn, whipping the Suburban through the turn, and watching the kids (and the TV/VCR combo unit they were watching at the time) roll around the back end as I practiced my nascent NASCAR driving skills. Got yelled at by Mrs. LHR for that one ... and deservedly so.

I took the same road across last year, but in the Jaguar, following a road trip that also included Atlanta and Biloxi, MS to visit friends. Solo return trip, so I enjoyed the turning road a LOT more this trip. Sadly, the state highway department has taken SOME of the fun out of that stretch of road by adding more passing zones and straightening out some stretches where they can. Still, an enjoyable drive and a chance to see a different part of the Ozarks.

Take I-70.

 

[bbenson67]

Ebronies, need some advice...Making a driving choice for the vacation...not flying...

Option A, Stay on the I70 to St. Louis, drop down to Memphis area, is a little faster, but 75 miles longer.

Option B, Take a straight shot to Memphis area, cut through the boonies of Methzou and the Land of inbred cousinfuckers.

Sidenote, will have Tits and the 4 kids, 4 under 7 strapped in the burban. I'm leaning towards option A because I hate slow stupid drivers and I'd imagine traveling through bumblescum I'll encounter many of them.

I don't know how well you know the Memphis area or if that's your final destination, but a couple of suggestions. It's hard to get bad BBQ in Memphis but my favorite is Charlie Vergo's Rendezvous a couple of blocks from Beale St. and across the street from The Peabody Hotel. Casual and delicious but a little touristy but quite affordable. One of several BBQ joints that was an Elvis favorite.

The Peabody Hotel is an institution and worth a stay or at least a visit to see the ducks parade through the lobby on the hour and to have a drink in the lobby bar. I can still taste the fresh blueberry mojitos served mint julep style. A little slice of heaven.

 

[Jim14510]

Ebronies, need some advice...Making a driving choice for the vacation...not flying...

Option A, Stay on the I70 to St. Louis, drop down to Memphis area, is a little faster, but 75 miles longer.

Option B, Take a straight shot to Memphis area, cut through the boonies of Methzou and the Land of inbred cousinfuckers.

Sidenote, will have Tits and the 4 kids, 4 under 7 strapped in the burban. I'm leaning towards option A because I hate slow stupid drivers and I'd imagine traveling through bumblescum I'll encounter many of them.

No advice but I'll pray for your sanity.

 

[God is a Husker]

Ebronies, need some advice...Making a driving choice for the vacation...not flying...

Option A, Stay on the I70 to St. Louis, drop down to Memphis area, is a little faster, but 75 miles longer.

Option B, Take a straight shot to Memphis area, cut through the boonies of Methzou and the Land of inbred cousinfuckers.

Sidenote, will have Tits and the 4 kids, 4 under 7 strapped in the burban. I'm leaning towards option A because I hate slow stupid drivers and I'd imagine traveling through bumblescum I'll encounter many of them.

depends what type of poor people you want to drive through (black or white)

PS: my parents just bought a lake house outside of Warsaw Missouri. My Dad says he loves it there because it’s just like Valentine. No shoes, no shirt, no problem.

Edit: and by “just” I mean last June, jameis christ 2020 flew by

 

[slattimer]

depends what type of poor people you want to drive through (black or white)

PS: my parents just bought a lake house outside of Warsaw Missouri. My Dad says he loves it there because it’s just like Valentine. No shoes, no shirt, no problem.

Edit: and by “just” I mean last June, jameis christ 2020 flew by

I’ve driven through bumble scum once. Hit some road construction and decided to take a detour in college coming back from tubing the Guadalupe and Comal rivers. By the way. That shit is fucking tits. But basically ended up in the armpit of America. NW Arkansas/SW Mizzou. Pretty sure we drove by a klan rally at one point.

we’re making a pit stop south of Memphis and huffing the rest of the way to gulf shores on Saturday. I prefer hauling ass on the interstate. Maybe take the “scenic” route on the way home.

 

[God is a Husker]

I’ve driven through bumble scum once. Hit some road construction and decided to take a detour in college coming back from tubing the Guadalupe and Comal rivers. By the way. That shit is fucking tits. But basically ended up in the armpit of America. NW Arkansas/SW Mizzou. Pretty sure we drove by a klan rally at one point.

we’re making a pit stop south of Memphis and huffing the rest of the way to gulf shores on Saturday. I prefer hauling ass on the interstate. Maybe take the “scenic” route on the way home.

I think @LoudHogRider had a good idea going south to Springfield then East then go Southeast cutting to Memphis

we did that once visiting my buddy who was in Memphis cuz his kid had brain cancer and was at Shriner hospital

From memory we went: Lincoln to St Joe (bathroom and fuel) St Joe to Bolivar (bathroom) Bolivar to West Plains (bathroom and fuel) West Plains to Jonesboro AR (bathroom, fuel and a cig cuz when in Rome)

PS: did that drive with a 110 lbs brown woman and a sleeping/happy/fat baby. Can’t imagine the hell you are about to go through. My advice: pop some hydros or Oxy and be secretly high, you’ll fit right into where you’re headed

 

[hothouse_corn]

I think @LoudHogRider had a good idea going south to Springfield then East then go Southeast cutting to Memphis

we did that once visiting my buddy who was in Memphis cuz his kid had brain cancer and was at Shriner hospital

From memory we went: Lincoln to St Joe (bathroom and fuel) St Joe to Bolivar (bathroom) Bolivar to West Plains (bathroom and fuel) West Plains to Jonesboro AR (bathroom, fuel and a cig cuz when in Rome)

PS: did that drive with a 110 lbs brown woman and a sleeping/happy/fat baby. Can’t imagine the hell you are about to go through. My advice: pop some hydros or Oxy and be secretly high, you’ll fit right into where you’re headed

Not related to the quoted post, but I think some time in the recent past I said that I hate McCook because they beat us at everything. I have to roll that back slighly.

McCook was the host site for district livestock judging where I won one of my most prized possessions: a trophy with a golden cow on top for "First Place, Beef." I say possession, but I loaned it to a buddy in college for some reason, and that asshole never gave it back.

 

[LoudHogRider]

Not related to the quoted post, but I think some time in the recent past I said that I hate McCook because they beat us at everything. I have to roll that back slighly.

McCook was the host site for district livestock judging where I won one of my most prized possessions: a trophy with a golden cow on top for "First Place, Beef." I say possession, but I loaned it to a buddy in college for some reason, and that asshole never gave it back.

A) How do you “loan” a trophy to someone?
B) I’d be hella pissed about not getting something like that back.

 

[hothouse_corn]

A) How do you “loan” a trophy to someone?
B) I’d be hella pissed about not getting something like that back.

First, it's a plastic cow on top of a generic trophy that I always joked I would turn into a hood ornament.

Second, I don't really know much about cows, heifers, steers, or bulls...I just knew how to write and present the justification really well. I think I got fourth in the sheep category, and I'd never even seen a sheep prior to that day of my freshman year of highschool. The fact that I won that trophy was joked about often.

Third, @SoCal_Corn makes internet trophies for folks all the time, so maybe he can just make me a virtual one.

Fourth, I think the guy I lent it to is good for it. I left my golf clubs in his garage in 2002 and never saw them again. Until, they suddenly showed up on my mom's front porch in 2018. His mom lives on the same block as my mom.

 

[bbenson67]

I think @LoudHogRider had a good idea going south to Springfield then East then go Southeast cutting to Memphis

we did that once visiting my buddy who was in Memphis cuz his kid had brain cancer and was at Shriner hospital

From memory we went: Lincoln to St Joe (bathroom and fuel) St Joe to Bolivar (bathroom) Bolivar to West Plains (bathroom and fuel) West Plains to Jonesboro AR (bathroom, fuel and a cig cuz when in Rome)

PS: did that drive with a 110 lbs brown woman and a sleeping/happy/fat baby. Can’t imagine the hell you are about to go through. My advice: pop some hydros or Oxy and be secretly high, you’ll fit right into where you’re headed

I've driven to Arkansas from Lincoln and we went through the Ozarks. My only contribution to this thread is that when you start seeing the signs in Missouri saying get your beer now as you near the Arkansas border, believe them. Who knew that the first 100 miles of Northern Arkansas was dry counties as in don't even think about buying a beer?

 

[bbenson67]

First, it's a plastic cow on top of a generic trophy that I always joked I would turn into a hood ornament.

Second, I don't really know much about cows, heifers, steers, or bulls...I just knew how to write and present the justification really well. I think I got fourth in the sheep category, and I'd never even seen a sheep prior to that day of my freshman year of highschool. The fact that I won that trophy was joked about often.

Third, @SoCal_Corn makes internet trophies for folks all the time, so maybe he can just make me a virtual one.

Fourth, I think the guy I lent it to is good for it. I left my golf clubs in his garage in 2002 and never saw them again. Until, they suddenly showed up on my mom's front porch in 2018. His mom lives on the same block as my mom.

Your second point requires the obligatory joke from that great comedy book, You Know You're from Nebraska When..... You know you're from Nebraska when the noon stock market report comes on and they talk about the price of barrows and gilts and you know what barrows and gilts are. FYI, a barrow is a castrated male pig and a gilt is a female pig which hasn't reproduced yet. It can also refer to a piglet under 6 months.

 

[slattimer]

Not related to the quoted post, but I think some time in the recent past I said that I hate McCook because they beat us at everything. I have to roll that back slighly.

McCook was the host site for district livestock judging where I won one of my most prized possessions: a trophy with a golden cow on top for "First Place, Beef." I say possession, but I loaned it to a buddy in college for some reason, and that asshole never gave it back.

Back in my FFA days, I became the state champ dairy food judger my senior year. Regular old Napoleon Dynamite. I didn't get some fancy trophy though...fucking Kansas.

 

[LoudHogRider]

Your second point requires the obligatory joke from that great comedy book, You Know You're from Nebraska When..... You know you're from Nebraska when the noon stock market report comes on and they talk about the price of barrows and gilts and you know what barrows and gilts are. FYI, a barrow is a castrated male pig and a gilt is a female pig which hasn't reproduced yet. It can also refer to a piglet under 6 months.

I had a fraternity brother in college that could do a PERFECT Arnold Peterson imitation. Arnold was an Omaha broadcaster who delivered the noon market report on the radio (KFAB?). When Jay slipped in the updates from the Sioux City and St. Joseph markets, it brought the house down.

 

[LoudHogRider]

First, it's a plastic cow on top of a generic trophy that I always joked I would turn into a hood ornament.

Second, I don't really know much about cows, heifers, steers, or bulls...I just knew how to write and present the justification really well. I think I got fourth in the sheep category, and I'd never even seen a sheep prior to that day of my freshman year of highschool. The fact that I won that trophy was joked about often.

Third, @SoCal_Corn makes internet trophies for folks all the time, so maybe he can just make me a virtual one.

Fourth, I think the guy I lent it to is good for it. I left my golf clubs in his garage in 2002 and never saw them again. Until, they suddenly showed up on my mom's front porch in 2018. His mom lives on the same block as my mom.

I can hear Paul Harvey's voice saying, "And now, for the REST of the story ..." There it is. ^^^