Things your wife does that drives you bonkers

[slattimer]

About blew a gasket today. Wife has a conference to go to this evening. Girls have ball practice, I go and get the kids after school and she asks if I need the diaper bag for our 1 year old. Well, yeah, I do probably. She says okay, I'll bring it to your room, as I had to go and get some stuff before I left today and was in her vehicle. Take the kids with me...waiting....waiting...waiting. Well what the hell, text her, hey, you bringing the bag anytime soon. "Oh, I put in in the back of your truck with his coat and blanket." WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK WIFE.

 

[Goskers07]

She often promises me a BJ, only for me to not receive said BJ before she falls asleep.

 

[Tyneb23]

Doesn't blow me enough for my liking

 

[ChocaEgg]

Everygoddamnthing.

 

[The Bearded One]

She often promises me a BJ, only for me to not receive said BJ before she falls asleep.

That's just fuckin cruel!

 

[Jim14510]

About blew a gasket today. Wife has a conference to go to this evening. Girls have ball practice, I go and get the kids after school and she asks if I need the diaper bag for our 1 year old. Well, yeah, I do probably. She says okay, I'll bring it to your room, as I had to go and get some stuff before I left today and was in her vehicle. Take the kids with me...waiting....waiting...waiting. Well what the hell, text her, hey, you bringing the bag anytime soon. "Oh, I put in in the back of your truck with his coat and blanket." WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK WIFE.

I'm a little skeptical about this "conference". Is it just an excuse for her and her friends to get together and drink wine?

 

[Jim14510]

Our trash can is in the kitchen. The kitchen is next to a 6 foot hallway that goes to the garage. Big trash cans in garage.

She takes the trash bag out of the can. Ties it up, opens the garage door and sets it 5 feet from the door in the garage. It's maybe 3 steps to the big trash can.

If I don't put them in the can she'll keep piling them up. Drives me fucking nuts.

 

[Fitzjess21]

So my wife is a dance teacher at a large studio here in town. Typically she gets home between 9-9:30 at night. During this time of year she does choreography for the musical at the high school I teach at. So these last two weeks she's been getting home about 10:30 every night. Thursday night she gets all pissy at me for telling my oldest he looked like a schmuck in his clothes. Figured that was the issue. Apparently not.....

Friday I'm trying to get a little and she's like " I'm still getting over being mad at you"

I'm like " for calling micah a schmuck?"

She says "No, for being absent and not present all week"

I go " Are you serious? You work when I'm out of school. Wtf am I supposed to do?" Remember....she was at musical practice 4 out of the 5 nights really late.

Needless to say I was apparently in the wrong.......still don't know why.

 

[Baron Winnebago]

So my wife is a dance teacher at a large studio here in town. Typically she gets home between 9-9:30 at night. During this time of year she does choreography for the musical at the high school I teach at. So these last two weeks she's been getting home about 10:30 every night. Thursday night she gets all pissy at me for telling my oldest he looked like a schmuck in his clothes. Figured that was the issue. Apparently not.....

Friday I'm trying to get a little and she's like " I'm still getting over being mad at you"

I'm like " for calling micah a schmuck?"

She says "No, for being absent and not present all week"

I go " Are you serious? You work when I'm out of school. Wtf am I supposed to do?" Remember....she was at musical practice 4 out of the 5 nights really late.

Needless to say I was apparently in the wrong.......still don't know why.

 

[HuskerPAC]

Can’t shut off lights, doesn’t shut her dresser drawers, doesn’t shut closet doors, doesn’t rinse food down the sink, doesn’t put her her laundry away, cuts tags off kid’s clothing and leaves those little plastic tabs on the floor, drops crumbs on the couch and brushes them onto the floor, keeps her vehicle absolutely disgusting, has about 15 water bottles at different levels of empty on her nightstand, doesn’t approve of my watching pornography.

 

[Eaton Beaver]

So my wife is a dance teacher at a large studio here in town. Typically she gets home between 9-9:30 at night. During this time of year she does choreography for the musical at the high school I teach at. So these last two weeks she's been getting home about 10:30 every night. Thursday night she gets all pissy at me for telling my oldest he looked like a schmuck in his clothes. Figured that was the issue. Apparently not.....

Friday I'm trying to get a little and she's like " I'm still getting over being mad at you"

I'm like " for calling micah a schmuck?"

She says "No, for being absent and not present all week"

I go " Are you serious? You work when I'm out of school. Wtf am I supposed to do?" Remember....she was at musical practice 4 out of the 5 nights really late.

Needless to say I was apparently in the wrong.......still don't know why.

Pics of dance teacher please?

 

[Eaton Beaver]

My wife always folds clothes so I can see it. No matter where I sit in the living room she will move so I can see or hear her.

 

[slattimer]

I'm a little skeptical about this "conference". Is it just an excuse for her and her friends to get together and drink wine?

Unfortunately, I don't think this is the case, or I'd have a better chance taking her to pound town. She doesn't smell boozy. Damn it.

 

[Jim14510]

has about 15 water bottles at different levels of empty on her nightstand,

Good one. Mine has at a minimum 4 half drank glasses of water. She does all that other stuff though. Including porn.

 

[HuskerDocCo]

always gets the brand name medicines, no generics. $5 copay vs $75, she’s 89 tho gotta keep her alive thanks gbr

 

[Dble E]

She asks my opinion and then argues with me. Fun stuff....

 

[Juro]

Not married, but fiancé. I pay for the Goddam house and bills, but she treats it like her personal closet and storage.

Apparently the 30 different bags she has acquired over her lifespan can’t be ridden of because she made need them one day.

 

[dsbigred1]

Mine asks me to handle the things she doesn’t enjoy- finances, yard, handy work-pretty typical guy stuff.
Then, the moment I make a decision about the finances, she is hounding me about it non-stop. I hear about it for days if the lawn is mowed 1 setting too short. And if I fix something, and it doesn’t look like Bob Vila did it, it’s a big deal. So I really have no issue telling her to shut the fuck up. It’s a nice understanding we have. She only gets super pissed about it every time I say it, and I keep saying it so I can keep my sanity.

 

[Alcaus]

She does this thing where I tell her what/how I'm going to do something and then, when I do it that way, gets pissed that I didn't do it the way she wanted it done.

It's super retarded

 

[God is a Husker]

Her expectation of the time it will take me (or others) to do something vs. literal reality



Example from last week: “Oh I thought you would have got all the rooms painted today.” — wife telling me she thought that I would finish painting 20 rooms in 7 hours….. the expectation was 1 person would be able to move furniture, remove fixtures, put drop cloths down, tape, cut in/trim and roll… then clean up and the paint to dry and then put all fixtures and furniture back…. in 7 hours.

PS: took me working by myself 3 days to go from nothing started to having it all done and everything totally back to how it was prior, I was pretty pleased with how quick I got it done. I even posted a pic of my painting shirt in the MLPFC thread cuz I was in such a good mood.