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DR crootin Jordan Seaton

Eaton Beaver said:
Christ! Would you shut the fuck up so I don't have to read your dumbass responses every other post!
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When I went under the water brother, I saw the face of Jesus dude. He told me I was his favorite wrestler and he needed my help brother. He reached out his hand to tag me in. We clapped hands brother and I started hearing angels chanting “Hogan Hogan Hogan”. Next thing I know I’m in a wrestling ring in hell dudes. I’m in a wrestling match for my soul! There’s demons having gay sex everywhere and they want me next dudes. This place was worse than Sturgis Road Wild 97 brother.

I saw this gnarly purple faced demon brother. I gave him a knuckle sandwich and threw him into the ropes and he came screaming back at me and I reached out the big yellow boot and connected with his face. I go in for the 1-2-3 brother and next thing I know a raging legion of magma cock gobblers dive into the ring and start giving me the boots brother. One is trying to tongue my asshole while a few hold me face down and the others are masturbating watching. I’m calling out to Jesus for help dudes.

I hear a “ohh yeaaa dig it” and see Macho dropping the big elbow on one demon. Next I hear “hey yo, Hollywood need my help mang” and brother Scott Hall flicks a toothpick into a demon’s eyes and gives him the outsiders edge. 10 more demons hit the ring and start overtaking us. I hear a familiar voice in the distance “I’ve came here to kick ass and chew bubble gum and I’m all outta gum” I see brother Roddy wearing sun glasses with a shotgun start blasting gay demons heads off.

“Ya miss me Hogan?” “Hell yea Roddy I missed you brother”. I hit the ropes and drop the big boot on a demon. I see Jesus standing next to Mean Gene, Bobby, Gorilla, and Andre smiling at me from outside the ring. Jesus slides into the ring and counts 1-2-3 and real American starts playing aloud in hell. Next thing I know I’m waking up on the ground hacking water out of my lungs. I was clinically dead for a few minutes brother but it felt like I was gone for a whole night. My name is Hulk Hogan and this is my near death experience

—Hulk Hogan after getting baptized, probably
 
Herbie said:
When I went under the water brother, I saw the face of Jesus dude. He told me I was his favorite wrestler and he needed my help brother. He reached out his hand to tag me in. We clapped hands brother and I started hearing angels chanting “Hogan Hogan Hogan”. Next thing I know I’m in a wrestling ring in hell dudes. I’m in a wrestling match for my soul! There’s demons having gay sex everywhere and they want me next dudes. This place was worse than Sturgis Road Wild 97 brother.

I saw this gnarly purple faced demon brother. I gave him a knuckle sandwich and threw him into the ropes and he came screaming back at me and I reached out the big yellow boot and connected with his face. I go in for the 1-2-3 brother and next thing I know a raging legion of magma cock gobblers dive into the ring and start giving me the boots brother. One is trying to tongue my asshole while a few hold me face down and the others are masturbating watching. I’m calling out to Jesus for help dudes.

I hear a “ohh yeaaa dig it” and see Macho dropping the big elbow on one demon. Next I hear “hey yo, Hollywood need my help mang” and brother Scott Hall flicks a toothpick into a demon’s eyes and gives him the outsiders edge. 10 more demons hit the ring and start overtaking us. I hear a familiar voice in the distance “I’ve came here to kick ass and chew bubble gum and I’m all outta gum” I see brother Roddy wearing sun glasses with a shotgun start blasting gay demons heads off.

“Ya miss me Hogan?” “Hell yea Roddy I missed you brother”. I hit the ropes and drop the big boot on a demon. I see Jesus standing next to Mean Gene, Bobby, Gorilla, and Andre smiling at me from outside the ring. Jesus slides into the ring and counts 1-2-3 and real American starts playing aloud in hell. Next thing I know I’m waking up on the ground hacking water out of my lungs. I was clinically dead for a few minutes brother but it felt like I was gone for a whole night. My name is Hulk Hogan and this is my near death experience

—Hulk Hogan after getting baptized, probably
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Okay. Thanks.
 
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