Tips for calming your woman down

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One thing not to do. Like I did yesterday....

1) Accidently text your wife that was meant for your buddies group chat bitching about driving 4 hours because you're at a function that she knew about for months because your wife and mother-in-law decided to adlib Easter because the sister-in-law and her fam that live in Oklahoma made a spontaneous trip back home, and you were let known that we're now celebrating Easter with the fam the next day, and she let me know at 11 pm the night before...

Whoops. She was not pleased.
 
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So her family is a lot closer to us than mine are. We get invited to a lot of different events and when one comes up at the last minute, I'm usually the one to say, nah. Nothing against her family, but I'm sorry, I have a monthly quota of meeting with them.

When I say nah, she is usually along the lines of, "What else do we have going on that is so important?"

Babe, it's simple. I have a full plan of doing nothing and that is how I want to do it. Doing nothing is something and that something is more important than going over to her family's house.


So we end up going anyway. I'm running out of ideas.
 
So her family is a lot closer to us than mine are. We get invited to a lot of different events and when one comes up at the last minute, I'm usually the one to say, nah. Nothing against her family, but I'm sorry, I have a monthly quota of meeting with them.

When I say nah, she is usually along the lines of, "What else do we have going on that is so important?"

Babe, it's simple. I have a full plan of doing nothing and that is how I want to do it. Doing nothing is something and that something is more important than going over to her family's house.


So we end up going anyway. I'm running out of ideas.
This is a great opportunity for you to grow some balls and say im staying home, but you can go.
 
This is a great opportunity for you to grow some balls and say im staying home, but you can go.
Did that before. Balls are still intact and I'd like to keep them that way, so I need more ideas/tips on how to calm the aftermath.
 
Did that before. Balls are still intact and I'd like to keep them that way, so I need more ideas/tips on how to calm the aftermath.
ALWAYS have a list of household projects in queue that she wants done. Periodically involve yourself in one of those projects and skip the family get together. You can't play this card EVERY time, but 60% of the time, it works every time.

The Chernobyl option is to alienate yourself from her family. Making a pass at her sister ought to do it.
 
ALWAYS have a list of household projects in queue that she wants done. Periodically involve yourself in one of those projects and skip the family get together. You can't play this card EVERY time, but 60% of the time, it works every time.

The Chernobyl option is to alienate yourself from her family. Making a pass at her sister ought to do it.
Just easier to take a shot of eye drops and give yourself the runs, imo
 
A coaching friend of mine did this. It's doubtful he stopped the aftermath of the event, but it was definitely effective immediately.

So he was out drinking with friends, and a late night turned into a really late night. He knew his wife was going to be pissed. So he can barreling into the driveway, loud, honking the horn. Then bursts into the house, clanging shit around, strips down naked, busts into the bedroom, flips on the light and yells "Who wants to fuck!?" He said his wife didn't move... 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣
 
I've found doing impressions of old WWF wrestlers or radio personalities that she has never heard of works great for my mood at least.

Ex: Macho Man, Ric Flair, Jim Rome, Limbaugh

She has particular disdain when I start doing Trump impressions because she sees it coming when I start holding my hands out awkward like Trump does.
"...you're wrong. Wow. I've never heard anybody be so wrong before. Disgusting"

Puts me in Zen mode when she is in war mode.
 
Did that before. Balls are still intact and I'd like to keep them that way, so I need more ideas/tips on how to calm the aftermath.
Drink and play video games
 
Just start getting naked and she'll probably start complaining how she's tired with a headache.
 
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