Not sports specific, but what are some gems you remember from highschool coaches, teachers, or parents?

[Bootleg11]

I've got a ton, but I'll start with just a pair and see if it goes anywhere so I don't shoot my entire load at once.

I'll start with a few gems from Coach Novacek, father of NFL HOF'er Jay Novacek, who happened to be the third most athletic of Coach's four kids:

"What are you doing playing hacky sack? I thought only queers and derelicts played with those things." -Said to my friend and fellow pole vaulter prior to track practice.​

​

"There are only three ways to run faster. Increase the pace of your stride, increase the length of your stride, or be born black." -Instructions at the beginning of every plyometrics day workout for four years of weight training class.​

​

"Good Luck. You're gonna need it." -Said to the varsity football team as we took the field to warm up for a game against top-three rated, undefeated Cozad with Brendan Holbein and Chris Dishman. (We won. Fuck that guy, but also may he rest in peace. He was my favorite)​

What gems do you remember?

You think Bump was more athletic than Jay?

 

[Bootleg11]

My senior year we were bad. Really bad and our head coach W.E. Roten was giving a speech after the Wednesday practice. It was week 7 and we were 0-6. My class and the class behind me had exactly 1 college athlete between the 2 and in east Texas that doesn't cut it.

So anyways, Coach Roten who we all knew was getting close to retirement says, "Boys, we're 0-6. There's no denying that we haven't gotten the job done. The administration has decided that it's time to let me go."

Everybody starts looking around, the assistant coaches (my dad being the defensive coordinator) are all shocked.

He continues, "They have already found my replacement. It's a china-man. His name is 'Win-one-soon and he'll be here on Monday'" It was pretty funny at the time.

We went on to win 2 of the last 3 and almost made the playoffs.
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I'll think about this, I'm sure I have some pretty funny stories of coaching staffs that I've been on, just gotta think about it for a minute.

 

[Jim14510]

Same exact thing for Law school


I’d say only 25% of my professors ever actually practiced.

Yeah I think that's the same thing for every profession. Some of the sciences are fine because the real world is research at the universities. A lot of other majors they should have some sort of work requirement though.

 

[HuskerDocCo]

back in college my old man told me “get a haircut and be somebody” so i gathered up a quarter and went to the barbershop 💈 and rode off on a tractor into the sunset

 

[ThomOsborneMD]

Middle school teacher - favorite of all time. There were 3 of us and him in the workroom doing something and he says “you know what they call a gay guys balls? Mudflaps”

don’t think I really understood it at the time but pretty damn ballsy of him to say that.

 

[MtnHusker]

Football Coach Jim "Killer" Kane during practice yelling at a player for screwing up "Anderson, I need you like I need another Pimple on my Ass".

 

[Cash68847]

I've got a ton, but I'll start with just a pair and see if it goes anywhere so I don't shoot my entire load at once.

I'll start with a few gems from Coach Novacek, father of NFL HOF'er Jay Novacek, who happened to be the third most athletic of Coach's four kids:

"What are you doing playing hacky sack? I thought only queers and derelicts played with those things." -Said to my friend and fellow pole vaulter prior to track practice.​

​

"There are only three ways to run faster. Increase the pace of your stride, increase the length of your stride, or be born black." -Instructions at the beginning of every plyometrics day workout for four years of weight training class.​

​

"Good Luck. You're gonna need it." -Said to the varsity football team as we took the field to warm up for a game against top-three rated, undefeated Cozad with Brendan Holbein and Chris Dishman. (We won. Fuck that guy, but also may he rest in peace. He was my favorite)​

What gems do you remember?

A guy from Gothenberg told me Bump was way better. I didn’t know if he was full of shit or not.

 

[Cash68847]

I've got a ton, but I'll start with just a pair and see if it goes anywhere so I don't shoot my entire load at once.

I'll start with a few gems from Coach Novacek, father of NFL HOF'er Jay Novacek, who happened to be the third most athletic of Coach's four kids:

"What are you doing playing hacky sack? I thought only queers and derelicts played with those things." -Said to my friend and fellow pole vaulter prior to track practice.​

​

"There are only three ways to run faster. Increase the pace of your stride, increase the length of your stride, or be born black." -Instructions at the beginning of every plyometrics day workout for four years of weight training class.​

​

"Good Luck. You're gonna need it." -Said to the varsity football team as we took the field to warm up for a game against top-three rated, undefeated Cozad with Brendan Holbein and Chris Dishman. (We won. Fuck that guy, but also may he rest in peace. He was my favorite)​

What gems do you remember?

My old principal Dave Gordon who they called Gordon the Warden would make you clean up the ditches or clean bathrooms etc for detention. He would also make you do push-ups and other physical stuff when you got in trouble.

Anyways, I was doing a job in Lexington for him when I got older when he moved on to the principal job there. He said come with with me for a second I need to show you something in the bathroom. He said look at at the backside of the toilet. I said I don’t see anything. He said look closer. I said okay I see a little black mark which he put on there with a magic marker. He said the couple kids who had detention didn’t clean good enough did they? Guess what they are doing after school again? He said until they clean that black mark off they will keep cleaning this bathroom. This was probably 10-15 years ago so it’s not like it a long time ago when you could be a true hardass. He was the type of guy to clean up a school but not the type of guy who could stay one place for a whole career because he would piss too many people off.

 

[God is a Husker]

My old principal Dave Gordon who they called Gordon the Warden would make you clean up the ditches or clean bathrooms etc for detention. He would also make you do push-ups and other physical stuff when you got in trouble.

Anyways, I was doing a job in Lexington for him when I got older when he moved on to the principal job there. He said come with with me for a second I need to show you something in the bathroom. He said look at at the backside of the toilet. I said I don’t see anything. He said look closer. I said okay I see a little black mark which he put on there with a magic marker. He said the couple kids who had detention didn’t clean good enough did they? Guess what they are doing after school again? He said until they clean that black mask off they will keep cleaning this bathroom. This was probably 10-15 years ago so it’s not like it a long time ago when you could be a true hardass. He was the type of guy to clean up a school but not the type of guy who could stay one place for a whole career because he would piss too many people off.

Hope he is gone cuz if not soon as it hits the media that a principle in Lex is making Hispanic or Somali students clean bathrooms and ditches he would be fired with cause.

 

[Cash68847]

Hope he is gone cuz if not soon as it hits the media that a principle in Lex is making Hispanic or Somali students clean bathrooms and ditches he would be fired with cause.

A few Latinos from Lex I know told me he was as hard on the white kids as the minorities. He had more issues with the white affluent families in Lex. The guy didn’t care who you were. He was right and he was going to chew your ass. It was the same thing at Sandy Creek. He pissed off certain families who thought they were the shit there too. Like I said his purpose was to clean up a school and move on.

 

[God is a Husker]

A few Latinos from Lex I know told me he was as hard on the white kids as the minorities. He had more issues with the white affluent families in Lex. The guy didn’t care who you were. He was right and he was going to chew your ass. It was the same thing at Sandy Creek. He pissed off certain families who thought they were the shit there too. Like I said his purpose was to clean up a school and move on.

Do you know if he is available from 2024 to 2028?

 

[Cash68847]

Do you know if he is available from 2024 to 2028?

If we had more principals and teachers like him kids would be in better shape. My high school basketball coach Dave Barrett who is now the principal at Adams Central was another hardass. That guy would be fired for what he did back then but I respected him because he was a good coach and make you tougher. I never had any issue getting my ass chewed if the coach was right.

 

[Goskers07]

Yeah I think that's the same thing for every profession. Some of the sciences are fine because the real world is research at the universities. A lot of other majors they should have some sort of work requirement though.

As the saying goes, if you can't do the job,, just teach it.

 

[Tell_Sackett]

My favorite coach growing up was full of one liners and he had a real... slow... deliberate... way of speaking which made his delivery even better (so you probably had to be there). He coached JH football and track, coached HS basketball, baseball, and assisted on HS football and taught Spanish so there were a lot of opportunities.

7th grade year of JH football practice, I was back returning a punt and let it get over my head. I turned my back to pick it up, and just as I turned I was absolutely leveled by our best player who was a full grown man child. I'm flat on my back, open my eyes and Coach is standing over me. He smiles and just says in that deliberate delivery... Welcome.... to Junior High... Foot...ball.

First game the next year we were coming off a season where we were undefeated and unscored upon. We were up 12-0 at half and ended up losing 14-12. My best friend and RB got knocked out of the game (with a later diagnosed concussion) and when we got back to the school gym, he just lined us all up against the wall, had us put our helmets back on and went down the line just slapping us upside the head. Then he has us take them off and he again went down the line pointing at each one of us yelling WIMP, WIMP, WIMP, WIMP. He came to my friend who was still in a daze and he just shook his head and said... Gaaahhwd... and then proceeded down the line with WIMP WIMP WIMP.

In track, I ran sprints and hurdles and had clipped and fallen while leading on the last hurdle in each of the last two meets. I was at practice and again clipped a hurdle and stumbled. He comes over to me shaking his head and says... Your brother was a great hurdler, your sister was a great hurdler, and I thought you had it in your blood.... But yoooouuu suck. Then he just chuckled and walked off.

 

[Williamsonframe]

If your going to smoke, smoke while your welding and if you get caught I didn't know you were smoking. Mr. Beaver. Fremont Sr. High.

 

[Williamsonframe]

Quit playing with your dingy. My dad yelling from the beach when I was in his sail boat.

 

[God is a Husker]

Quit playing with your dingy. My dad yelling from the beach when I was in his sail boat.

All joking aside I use a quote from the Dad in Tommy Boy all the time when I’m talking to different small towns in KS/NE.

“You’re either growing or you’re dying, there ain’t no 3rd direction.”

 

[hothouse_corn]

Jerry Murtaugh had some gems during HS football practices that I dare not utter even here.

Go ahead and utter them here. Just don't attribute the quotes to Jerry and you'll be fine.

Nobody said Falls City Public Schools are an Ivy feeder

High School government/journalism/history teacher, when speaking of the Michael Ryan thing in the area, gave the advice "If you ever get invited to a hoedown in Richardson County, don't go." Pretty good advice IYAM.

"if you roll around with the trash you'll come out smelling like shit." Coach got in hot water for saying that. In hindsight he was obviously right.

Coach Novacek got fired as head varsity football coach because some parents didn't like how colorful his language was on the sidelines of games and at practice. Fast forward exactly one year, and he's hired as an assistant coach for the freshman team.

In his second year in that role, the head frosh coach got fired because he left the frosh volleyball team at the gym in Holdrege so the football team could eat. That damn freshman volleyball match was just taking too long, I guess. So, Coach Novacek was promoted to Head Freshman Football Coach.

You think Bump was more athletic than Jay?

I was only four when Bump quarterbacked the Swedes to an undefeated regular season and class B championship game loss to Columbus Scotus, and even younger than that when Jay played. The consensus of their parents was that Bump was most talented, followed by their daughter (name escapes me), then Jay, then their oldest.

But, Bump did hold the state all-class pole vault record for almost 30 years before Brett Maher broke it IIRC. When I graduated, the Pat Novacek coached Bump N, Jay N, and Lenny Ambler were 1, 2, 3 on the all-class top ten.

 

[God is a Husker]

High School government/journalism/history teacher, when speaking of the Michael Ryan thing in the area, gave the advice "If you ever get invited to a hoedown in Richardson County, don't go." Pretty good advice IYAM.

@Link- look at this guy who thinks he is better than moonshine, meth and menthol cigarettes

 

[hothouse_corn]

@Link- look at this guy who thinks he is better than moonshine, meth and menthol cigarettes

Which damn mafia do you really want to be associated with? Dawson County, Richardson County, or Swimtown?