@Poor_and_Stupid’s Christmas Day flying experience (very bad)

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Poor_and_Stupid

Prolific Beaver Murderer
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Sandy Vagina Crew
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(Sorry long post)

I know what you are all thinking. Who the fuck is stupid enough to deal with the airlines around Christmas time? Well let it be known that @Poor_and_Stupid knew it was bad idea, but he let his wife’s family drag him along anyhow.

We were flying out to see my brother-in-law who is in the Marines. He’s based at Quantico, Virginia which is just south of D.C.

The first bad omen came a few days before we left. We had a direct flight from Omaha to D.C. that got cancelled. Now we had to fly into Chicago (now to be referred to as Chiraq for the rest of the post.) The flight from Omaha to Chiraq was good. It was pretty much right on time. Got to Chiraq Midway (we were flying Southwest) around 12:00 P.M. and our connection to D.C. was scheduled for 1:00. It had already been delayed to 1:40 but no big deal.

We find our gate and we are there for about an hour and then they announce that the plane we were supposed to fly on has been decommissioned for maintenance or something like that so they send us to another gate. After 45 minutes at the next gate they tell us they are changing the gate again. We head to that gate and wait around for at least an hour before they tell us they need to find one more flight attendant. I think it was about 4:00 when one showed up to cheers from many of the poor souls in attendance.

They promptly get us on the plane. We are sitting for awhile and nothing is happening. My mother-in-law then says that they are now taking luggage back out of the plane. We were told that they put baggage from the next flight on our plane and that they were sorting it out. This took like 2 hours. The flight attendants said they didn’t know what the hold up was, but we thought they were keeping something from us.

Now I think it was roughly 6:30 and now since that took so long one of our pilot’s timed out and couldn’t legally fly the plane. So now they are looking for another pilot. They actually let us deplane and buy food which I’ve never seen before. Roughly 8:00 another pilot shows up to cheers from the passengers. Things are looking positive, but then another pilot shows up. They are having a discussion and their facial expressions are concerning. Both of these guys showed up but we only needed one of them. Our copilot was still a guy from earlier. They were on the phone trying to figure out which one of them was officially supposed to fly the plane or some shit like that. It was about 9:00 by the time that finally got sorted out.

The plane is finally airborne a sometime after 10:00. Things are looking up, but it was a false sense of hope. This post is getting too long so in short, we waited around the baggage claim until 4:00 A.M. eastern time but our bags would never come up. Tons of bags were coming but they were from a bunch of cancelled flights. Finally we were told from some other people on our flight that the baggage service lady told them that our entire flight’s luggage was still in Chiraq. Thanks for letting us stand around for 4 hours for nothing stupid cock suckers. At least announce that to us. Not sure where our shit is but they say it should still come to D.C. but I guess we will see.

Hope everyone had a better Christmas Day than me. Only success of the whole experience was that the plane didn’t crash.
 
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Now that Im back home and away from the right coast, I cant imagine not just driving wherever
 
Who would fly around the Holidays? Just kidding OP. Fortunate that my family is all in the Midwest - either in Nebraska or a bordering state.

Good luck OP. I hope your brother-in-law has soap and deodorant.
 
Who would fly around the Holidays? Just kidding OP. Fortunate that my family is all in the Midwest - either in Nebraska or a bordering state.

Good luck OP. I hope your brother has soap and deodorant.
All of my side is pretty close to home. Farthest I’ve had to drive for Christmas is 80 miles. My dad is terrified of flying so I never experienced aviation until I was dating my wife.
 
My in-laws booked us this morning on Southwest to fly to Orlando to go to Disney. They cancelled our flights last night and I’m glad we at least get to stay home and not deal with being stuck in Dallas with everyone there.

What a shit show.
 
My in-laws booked us this morning on Southwest to fly to Orlando to go to Disney. They cancelled our flights last night and I’m glad we at least get to stay home and not deal with being stuck in Dallas with everyone there.

What a shit show.
I’m so jealous of you right now. My sister-in-law is supposed to fly back to Denver on Thursday and that flight just got cancelled this morning. We are supposed to fly home Saturday. We have a direct flight back to Omaha. I’m fully expecting to be stranded here.
 
I’m so jealous of you right now. My sister-in-law is supposed to fly back to Denver on Thursday and that flight just got cancelled this morning. We are supposed to fly home Saturday. We have a direct flight back to Omaha. I’m fully expecting to be stranded here.
We had a stupid moment where we’re going to drive last night to make our connection but I don’t think this will be straightened out by Monday for our return flight. Good luck getting back.
 
I consider myself a pretty patient guy. That scenario would have made me kill people with kitchen utensils.
One thing that amazed me was how well all the toddlers behaved while we we stuck on the tarmac for so long. Very minimal fussing given the situation. I think there would have been fatalities if there were kids screaming the whole time.
 
One thing that amazed me was how well all the toddlers behaved while we we stuck on the tarmac for so long. Very minimal fussing given the situation. I think there would have been fatalities if there were kids screaming the whole time.
I believe I'm capable of putting a plastic spork through a human skull given the right levels of irritation. Allowing cell phone telephone conversations in-flight would most certainly result in the flight being diverted to the nearest airport for my arrest, though I'm equally as certain that if I can get a jury of my peers (fellow airline passengers with 1M+ air miles), I'll not only be acquitted but my likeness will be captured in a good light for the statue they'll build in my honor.
 
I believe I'm capable of putting a plastic spork through a human skull given the right levels of irritation. Allowing cell phone telephone conversations in-flight would most certainly result in the flight being diverted to the nearest airport for my arrest, though I'm equally as certain that if I can get a jury of my peers (fellow airline passengers with 1M+ air miles), I'll not only be acquitted but my likeness will be captured in a good light for the statue they'll build in my honor.
The shit people wear while flying is remarkable. That bothers me way more than about anything aside from when people rush up trying to get off the plane. Makes me shaking mad.
 
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