Best pickup lines (2 Viewers)

[Jim14510]

I imagine your wife is not happy

Sometimes you make me laugh.

 

[Cookiemonster]

The classic “ I eat ass” “ or would you like a mustache ride” usually works.

Ask her “ have you ever felt the inside of your belly button. Then when she says no, say “ I won’t be able to either but at least I’m setting low expectations.”
That surprisingly worked for me often if performed correctly with proper tone and infliction.

 

[Baron Winnebago]

The classic “ I eat ass” “ or would you like a mustache ride” usually works.

Ask her “ have you ever felt the inside of your belly button. Then when she says no, say “ I won’t be able to either but at least I’m setting low expectations.”
That surprisingly worked for me often if performed correctly with proper tone and infliction.

Yeah but you're either very attractive or excuse dick heat that's the polar opposite of what Jim can manage

 

[Cookiemonster]

Yeah but you're either very attractive or excuse dick heat that's the polar opposite of what Jim can manage

I’m sure Jim can recite boot scoot and boogey. Just go that route then.

 

[Jim14510]

The classic “ I eat ass” “ or would you like a mustache ride” usually works.

Ask her “ have you ever felt the inside of your belly button. Then when she says no, say “ I won’t be able to either but at least I’m setting low expectations.”
That surprisingly worked for me often if performed correctly with proper tone and infliction.

I'd say. Have you ever given yourself an orgasm?

If yes: Great. You can finish yourself off after I'm done.

If no: There's always tomorrow!

 

[SoCal_Corn]

Do you have any Danish in you?

Would you like some?

View attachment 6232

Or IRISH

 

[LoudHogRider]

Or IRISH

I have this album, and I remember that opening from listening to it hundreds of times "back in the day".

 

[BIG TONE SOPRANO]

You’re not terrible looking. Works every time

 

[Goskers07]

Some that have been used tonight on my wife:

- Wanna go half and half on a bastard child?
- Let's go to the bedroom and get something straight between us.
- Nice shoes, wanna fuck?

That third one might have sealed it. Will report back on success.

 

[That SOB Van Owen]

Ask her to spell “me”

She will inevitably say “M-E”

At which point you say “you forgot the D”

Naturally like any sane person she will inform you “there’s no D in me”

to which you say “not yet”

 

[SoCal_Corn]

I have this album, and I remember that opening from listening to it hundreds of times "back in the day".

View attachment 6421

One of my top 5 ALL TIME best LIVE LPs.
&
My all time fave Rockstar. 35 years ago today is his passing.

I rock Thin Lizzy multiple times each week.
The AMAZON PRIME new DOC is quite excellent btw



In the end of the hallway leading to the master, of my house here in AZ.

 

[realbp]

This one works every time.

You: "Is your daddy a chicken farmer?"

Her: (Most Likely) "No. Why?"

You: "'Cause you sure can raise cocks!"

She'll be flattered and laugh (usually).