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Ha ha! Every time we visit my cousins for the Michigan/Nebraska game their frat buddies have this beer bong they've used for 30 years. It's a hollowed out skull with a corrugated hose.
I'll try to fend off the pipe/skull stuff to protect you, but I'm not very imposing and also very cowardly, so it won't go that well. At least we'll all enjoy the shitty beer for a while.